A path set before me...

for a while now i have had this feeling that God is calling me to work in the Pro-life movement. It comes in subtle whispers. I notice myself reading alot of books about Natural Family Planning (NFP). I am friends with an amazing teacher of NFP in the Charlotte area, who has given me amazing encouragement and points of contact. Through my own journey of trying to conceive, I have learned so much about the human body, and the truly incredible gift of life. Being able to create with my husband and God, these amazing little people has been one of the best experiences of my life. I know that some aren't as blessed to have getting pregnant come easily. My parents struggled for years before turning to adoption, for which I am eternally grateful.

I have been researching and debating on which method to become a teacher of NFP, as there are several choices. My biggest fears are not having the time to commit with 3 small children at home. Will I get the chance to truly touch the lives of couples in the amazing way? Will i be the saving grace for a marriage that could be falling apart from infertility? Do i want to take on that role in other peoples lives? Will i even be good at it? While I do have a passion for it, I worry that like most projects i set out to do, Ill give up too easily. Do i have the means to get the necessary training required to teach?

I know the need it great, as I read stories everyday about women struggling to conceive, and it truly hurts my heart. I want to help couples. I want to serve the Lord to the best of my ability. I don't know what I am capable of, only God knows that. I know that if this is something He is truly calling me to do then He will light my path...I have to place my passion and desires in His hands each day. I love this lesson because it applies so much to the process of having a baby. Babies are gifts from above. A perfect image of the DIVINE CREATOR of all life. I am thankful for the loving hand of the Lord in this endeavor. I am thankful for my Catholic faith so as to have a TRUE understanding of the sanctity of life. I am thankful for my wonderful, God given husband who encourages me and truly helps guide my soul to heaven by serving the Lord. I ask for your prayers for my path to be well lit, and easy to follow...

The " Tooth Fairy" Diaries

Max lost his first tooth today, November 12, 2011.  He was so excited, and even let us help encourage it out by letting us wiggle it too! We did end up giving it a decent tug at the end to finally get it out, since it had been ready to come out for days and was driving Max crazy. We definitely were excited that the tooth fairy now gets to start visiting our house.

I have very fond memories of the tooth fairy from my childhood, as does Mike. My mother actually still has all my baby teeth in a bag, which I find a wee bit creepy. Mike and I wanted to make sure Max has this fond memory as well...so we have been playing up the tooth fairy all week, in anticipation for his tooth falling out. He was so excited, and his little face lit up every time we talked about it. I am so excited to go put a quarter under his pillow. hopefully, he will remember to look under his head in the morning!!!

I cant believe how much he has grown up in 5 years. I remember his sweet chubby little face running around at 8 months old, and it seems like an eternity since then. I am truly learning to cherish each moment with my babies, as this milestone has really struck the sentimental chord in my heart. Time really flies!

Bella's first "real" movie experience

Mike and I decided, after much deliberation, to take Bella to a movie for her 2nd birthday coming up. We went to see "Puss in Boots" mostly because she LOVES Shreck...or at least loves to carry the movie box around with her everywhere she goes. We had a great time as a family, and we really enjoyed the movie, although our children didn't understand most of the humor, they did enjoy the colors and characters on the screen!

While we did have a good time, I'm reminded of the reasons we just don't go to the movies. First, its EXTREMELY EXPENSIVE!! I wont say how much we spent, but for most people it was probably equivalent to a tank of gas. Second, trying to get our kids to sit still that long is a challenge. Isabella did very well for not quite being 2, but it did take both Mike and I distracting her more than once to get her back into her chair and quiet. Third, we did notice that some of the content in the movie was a bit inappropriate even for our kids who wouldn't really get it. I find that most animated movies that we screen these days are very inappropriate and we wouldn't think to bring our kids to them. Lastly, we were EXHAUSTED!!!! I wanted to enjoy the movie too, but trying to hold down the fort was quite the task, even as well behaved as the kids were.

I do believe next time we will just wait for the red box and the comfort of our own home!!!

the hanidcap button

we made an attempt at daily mass today BC I was having a hard time giving my anxiety back to the Lord about our finances. I was fully prepared for the difficult time I have been having with Isabella approaching 2, but was confident that with a new drawing pad doddle thing ( that's the technical term) on my phone, that Max would sit quietly. We arrived on time ( amazing), and got a seat in the back row so as not to disrupt everyone with our ups and downs. I handed the phone to Max, and told him to sit quietly so mommy could pray. About 7-8 minutes into mass, aka the homily, I had to take Bells out to stand between the two sets of doors at the back of the church. She was getting into everything, I mean everything...someone had left their umbrella out there...she BROKE IT! She knocked over the Mary statue as well...All I needed was 30 MINUTES with the LORD, 30 MINUTES...i was not going to get it this morning. A few minutes later, Max came RUNNING out to tell me my phone was ringing, at the TOP of his lungs. I instructed him to go sit down, the consecration was coming up and he needed to let other people pray. Skip through the 3 other times he came out to me in the next 5 minutes to the MIDDLE of the most important part of Mass...when I had insisted Max just sit with me in the back...to the handicap doors FLYING OPEN with all their swooshing glory as if we needed EVERYONE to know we were back there...i was mortified...MORTIFIED!!! I gave up and took the kids outside to just sit so I could regain control of myself.  I just needed 30 MINUTES...to sit and have receive the Lord's grace for my worry/anxiety...30 MINUTES!!!

i guess the Lord knew my heart was in the right place BC we got word today of some GREAT financial news, and I also had 2 random phone calls for MARY KAY and sold $100 worth of product!!! Thank you Lord, for rewarding my diligence even if it didn't come to fruition! I could definitely look back and smile on today!!

My Stance...

First, read this article...
http://dailycaller.com/2011/08/01/obama-administration-approves-no-cost-birth-control-including-morning-after-pill/

Now...I WILL NOT PAY FOR OTHER WOMEN TO HAVE ABORTIONS, AND I WILL NOT CONTRIBUTE OR BE FORCED TO CONTRIBUTE TO THE MURDER OF INNOCENT CHILDREN.

Why cant we put this much time and effort in teaching abstinence? Does it not also deserve its fair share of the spot light, instead of convincing women that their only options are some form of Birth control...I AM LIVID! I am quoting directly from the Planned Parent website

Abstinence at a Glance

• A behavior that prevents pregnancy
• Prevents sexually transmitted infection
• Safe, easy, and convenient

SO WHAT IS THE PROBLEM??? The problem is that Planned Parenthood makes no money if people are abstinent. They wouldn't be able to advertise or promote things like "Susan G. Komen" or the pro-choice/pro-abortion movement. The corrupt relationship between these 2 organizations is for another blog for sure.

I cant believe that women really buy this nonsense. Do we, as women, take the time to understand exactly what birth control does? It tricks our body into being in a "constant" state of pregnancy, so that your ovaries don't release eggs. If an egg happens to get through, and is fertilized, your uterus is already a toxic environment so the egg wont implant, therefore causing spontaneous abortions in THOUSANDS of women every month. YOU COULD BE ABORTING A BABY EVERY MONTH AND NOT KNOW IT. As a Catholic, I believe that life begins at the moment of conception. For those of you who don't, I ask you this question: At what point did your son, daughter, sister, brother, mom, dad, aunt, uncle or cousin become a person in the womb???? If you don't believe that this TINY, Microscopic cell, that creates every organ in the body from itself, isn't a person the moment it starts dividing and multiplying...then when does it become your mom/dad, sister/brother...or when did YOU BECOME YOU?????

I am outraged that my tax dollars are the reason that the government feels they can MANDATE companies to give FREE BIRTH CONTROL ( BC if YOU aren't paying for it, I am) to their employees. This statement INFURIATES ME....

“Currently, nearly one in three women finds it difficult to pay for birth control, and that’s why the United States has a far higher unintended-pregnancy rate than other industrialized countries. Making family-planning services available at no cost will help millions of women prevent unintended pregnancy and thereby reduce the need for abortion.”

Read more: http://dailycaller.com/2011/08/01/obama-administration-approves-no-cost-birth-control-including-morning-after-pill/#ixzz1cnAPrkA8

Teaching women how their bodies work will prevent millions of unplanned pregnancies and reduce the need for abortions. We have such a high un-intended pregnancy rate BC we don't care enough about our youth or how God designed sex to be used. We aren't teaching our children that waiting until you are married is one of the most PRECIOUS gifts we can give to our spouse. TO be able to say: "I am untouched and save myself for you, even before I knew you" is exactly how sex inside of marriage was deemed by God to be. We find our society pulling us down this path of destruction instead of teaching responsibility. Instead of teaching men that women are gifts from the Lord, and are to cherished we are teaching them that we are objects to lust after, and if there is an unplanned pregnancy, well don't worry, we have a pill for that.

The Planned Parenthood site go on further to say that abstinence...

• has no medical or hormonal side effects
• is free

Women and men abstain from sex play for many reasons — even after they've been sexually active. A couple may even choose to be abstinent after having had sex play with each other. The reasons people choose to be abstinent may change throughout life.

People choose abstinence to

• prevent pregnancy
• prevent STDs
• wait until they're ready for a sexual relationship
• wait to find the right partner
• have fun with romantic partners without sexual involvement
• focus on school, career, or extracurricular activities
• support personal, moral, or religious beliefs and values
• get over a breakup
• heal from the death of a partner
• follow medical advice during an illness or infection

Any woman or man can abstain from sex play. Many do so at various times in their lives. Some choose to abstain from sex play for long periods in their lives.

Special Advantages for Teens Sexual relationships present risks. Abstinence is a very good way to postpone taking those risks until you are better able to handle them. Women who abstain until their 20s — and who have fewer partners in their lifetimes — may have certain health advantages over women who do not. They are less likely to get STDs. Because they are less likely to get an STD, they are also less likely to become infertile or develop cervical cancer.

Now I do have a few problems with some of this information, but for the most part its accurate. SO WHY would i put a pill into my body that keeps my body from doing something every month that God designed it to do? There is a certain flow to a women's menstrual cycle for a reason. The hormone changes during the menstrual cycle are put in place so that the body is ready to achieve pregnancy. Through abstinence if a pregnancy is not wanted by the couple...they can avoid it without having the HORRENDOUS side effects of the pill, which include but are not limited to:

bleeding between periods( BC that's what I want, more bleeding)
breast tenderness
hmmmm?)
heart attack
strokes
blot clots in the legs, lungs, and brain ( SERIOUSLY...is it worth that)


THESE ARE FATAL PEOPLE!!!!  Please call your representative, and tell this government that socialism isn't OK. Tell them that "we the people" should have a say in where our money goes...PLEASE, I BEG you to stand up for the RIGHT to life for these innocent babies. Stand up for yourself, as women, and send the message home that our bodies are to be temples of the LORD...not to be forced (free or not) to be abused in this way!!



the working mom

so honestly...

I'm dreading going to work in just a few hours. Despite the fact that I got a job an amazing company and I truly wouldn't spend time away from my kids and enjoy being anywhere else, I'm still going to miss my babies!

so in lieu of my bad spirit...I'm writing just to say a few things I am thankful for.

1.) I am thankful for my 3 beautiful gifts from God. I am thankful for being able to create with God and my husband the amazing little people they are.
2.) I am thankful for the gifts and prayers answered from the Holy Spirit in the last week.
3.) I am thankful for The Catholic Company.
4.) I am thankful to my sister and parents and Mike for helping with the kids when I cant be here. Its bad enough having to leave them but at least they are with people that love them.
5.) I am thankful to God Almighty for my husband. Despite how hard life has been, he strives everyday to put the needs of his family above the needs of himself. Somedays, that is really hard!
6.) I thankful that all 3 of my babies are sleeping soundly right now. A gift from above so that I can finish some last minute things before I head out. The Lord does know exactly what I need.


AMEN!!!

ADHD...do I even buy it??

I am sitting here writing this just as the 5 year old, who seems to have been taken over by some entity, sleeps so peacefully next to me. How can this be the same child who a few hours ago was puking from having a temper tantrum and threw a book at me??? How can these even be the same person.

I sit here writing this so that in 2 days time when we head back to the doctor, and hear the acronym ADHD, I don't blow a gasket. Do i really believe ADHD exists? Do I think its just some ridiculous thing made up by drug companies to try to test drugs out on kids? To be perfectly honest...I'm not sure what i think.

I know that I have a husband who suffers from ADD and i do mean suffers. I watch him battle his ADD every moment of everyday so that he wont have to take medicine and consequently have a label attached to him. For some reason when I look into the eyes of my child, I just don't see it.Maybe its a defense mechanism that my brain has implanted to keep me from truly accepting this diagnosis. I'm not sure. I look at his angelic sleeping face, and think what must it be like for him to live everyday being out of control....and then it HIT me like a ton of bricks....

YES, I DO BELIEVE ADHD EXISTS!!!

If i choose not to believe in it, then what do I do to help my child who just suffers everyday even when given loving, guiding, encouraging parenting. How can I help him learn to cope with something that I don't really understand, and that he might not have the intelligence yet to get? If I choose to think that its just an over diagnosis for when people don't really want to take the time to find out whats wrong with their child, or for why their child goes bonkers after being seated for 7 hours a day, then my son still lives in turmoil.

For my sons sake, I have to believe its real. I believe that we are doing whats best for him at this point. I believe that this will get better with or without medicine. I believe that I have put this off for an ENTIRE year, to the detriment of my son, because I don't want him to be labeled or to have an excuse. I believe that God has His amazing, loving hands guiding my steps and giving me strength to accept what I know is coming. I believe that i have a husband who can understand what life is like for our son, and who believes this is the right thing to do also.

I AM TERRIFIED. scared down to my core. I am worried that the meds might really have lasting effects. I am worried the medicine is going to completely change all the things i truly love about my son. I fear I wont know who he is anymore. I fear that his sweet personality will just become a lifeless shell...still trapped, but in a different way. I fear that this could be wrong...and then what do I tell him when he asks why he had to take the medicine and it didn't make him better.

oh Lord, calm my heart and help me put my trust in YOU!!