Where is this child's mother??

tattoo #2, compliments of Gloria! HA!

Max earns his Yellow Belt!

Max has been very blessed to have the opportunity to take Tae Kwon Do lessons. It has been very good for him in so many ways. He is learning self-control ( I have done a poor job of exemplifying this virtue for him), discipline, and so many other things. All the kids start out at white belt, which stand for purity ( meaning they know nothing about TKD). After several weeks, maybe 2-3 months total, the child is then ready to "test" for the next belt. This is done in a group setting, and only on occasion is the child singled out. Max was slated to go in the earlier group, but I could tell he was nervous. He is the child, when he doesnt know what to expect, he just shuts down. I mean...HE SHUT DOWN! He wouldnt talk to anyone, including the master, and ended up hovering under a desk, just sobbing b/c "he didnt want his yellow belt". 

Now I admit, this type of behavior DRIVES ME CRAZY! "Someone else is paying good money for this, for you, and you will get up and do whatever you are asked to do, no matter how you feel"..is pretty much my attitude. Shame on me. I have never been very good with helping Max overcome his emotions ( which can be very real and very raw), and I tend to just get fed up myself. I ended up telling his master that he would not be testing and then left. I was so upset for Max. I was so disheartened. I was in that moment when you think your child will never outgrow this! I told Max I was more upset that he wouldnt even go out and try, than if he had tried and failed. (ok, I didnt use the word failed) When he got home, his cousin asked him what happened. Then, the 2 of them preceded to go through all the "forms" Max needed to know, and not 10 minutes later, Max came back and said he was ready to try. I also told him that if he wasnt going to follow through this time, that we would have to be done with TKD! I explained about the money and the time spent to take him there, and that it was ok if he didnt like (but he does), but to throw everyone else off their schedules (which we live on in a house of 13 people) was inconsiderate of everyone. Low and behold, he did it! Not only did he do it, but b/c he missed the earlier group, he was with MUCH older children. The skills they have to perform were far from  Max's level, but he tried all of them. He did his best to watch the others, an follow their lead. He broke his boards, both kicking and using his hand! It was great to watch! I will have to post the video at a later time...its taking forever to upload!

I think the most important and overwhelming moment that took place was during the time when the kids were practicing their HIGH KICKS! Max had not learned this yet, but did his best to follow along. At one point he seemed to really hurt himself, limping all the back to his spot in line. I mean, you could see the tears welling in his eyes. He was hopping on one foot, and was really holding back the crying, and running over to me! But he didnt. For the first time in his LIFE, he didnt give in and let his emotions get the better of him. I WAS MORE THAN PROUD! I am sure there arent words to express this amazing moment as a mother. It still brings me to tears thinking about it in this moment! I feel like 6 years of work (albeit, not very consistent work, and having set a poor example) came to fruition in that moment. Lord, give me the grace and wisdom to raise THIS child to seek your comfort. Amen.

first row, 3rd from the left

Gus turns 6 months!

How can it be that my sweet baby is 1/2 a year old already!?!?! Time is flying! This also throws at me that Thanksgiving is only 6 months away too...which means Christmas is creeping up ever so sneakily!!!  

sleeping with his puppy!

My thoughts on the IHM Home School Conference (Part 1)

 It was my first time attending a conference of this nature, so I give you my thoughts and opinions as such, and can offer no comparisons to other events firsthand! I share my reactions and thoughts on just one of the talks on Friday. I will post more, but as individual posts, for it is too much to put into one blog!

Friday there were 4 talks. The first by an amazing priest, whom I have always enjoyed listening to. The power of his words reached right into me, as he spoke about forming the moral conscience. I have also been reading and following along with Sarah @Amongst Lovely Things, and she has posted twice now about forming the moral imagination through reading classic fairy tales. A HUGE EYE OPENER FOR ME! I was raised on the Disney version of fairy tales (YUCK), and often struggled in school when we did read decent literature, as I did NOT appreciate it!

 Anyhow, this priest was so on point about this part of the parenting, and growing in my own understanding of the Faith. He spoke about how "freedom is the ability to choose what is right and good." He spoke of the natural law that is inscribed on the hearts of each of us, as God's creation, and that seeking satisfaction outside of God's law will never make any of us happy. WOW! WOW! I am pretty sure I spent my entire life, minus the last 3-4 years, seeking this type of satisfaction. How could I be capable of showing this to my children when I am so immature in this area myself? As always, God had the answer. God spoke these words through this priest standing before me " God's grace is ALWAYS sufficient". Does God know what I need to hear, and when I am ready to hear it or what?  He continues to speak about our job as parents is to give our children a properly formed conscience, based on Church teaching, regular and constant prayer, regular reception of the sacraments ( esp. the Eucharist), and striving for excellence in living out virtue. I have an obligation to know my faith and to continue to form my conscience accordingly. If there is anything the last year has taught me its that I can never go back to not knowing what I know now. Sure, I could ignore it, and continue to seek satisfaction outside of God's law, and continue to allow myself and my children to be unhappy. I could ignore it, and God will still hold me accountable for that choice. We are not the auditors of good and evil, God's divine law is, which He put on the hearts of each of us during His formation of man.

SO, what does all this mean in regards to homeschooling? My primary goal should be the the forming of my children's moral conscience by way of teaching them about God. The means of doing so are Mass, prayer, the sacraments, and helping them live the virtues to the best of the ability. How can I do this if they are away from me 7-8 hours a day in "school"? How can I continue to strive for perfection in said virtues if the means that God has given me to do so are gone all day? Am I ready and eager to accept the moral teachings of the Church, so I am able to LIVE them out for my kids? Do I even know the moral teachings of the Church well enough to be the teacher of them? This I do not know, but I do know that God's grace is always sufficient. If I am seeking out the Lord through the means He has given me through His Church, then I feel I can not fail. I know that for our family, home schooling is about so much more than "sheltering our children" from the evil that prevails in this world. I do not think there is a way to keep them away from it anyway. My job in being called to home school is to RAISE GOOD CATHOLICS, who can stand on a properly formed moral conscience, so that when the world attacks them for it, they are able to defend it, and die for it. This priest hit the nail on the head for me, and articulated what I knew God has wanted for our family, but just didn't have the words to express it!

Add these to the photo book...

Bella's latest photographs! I, literally, just let her take the camera in the yard and go at it. I do not watch or bug her. She brings me that camera when she is done, and we look at them together...I am always AMAZED at how good she is! My 2 favorite!

Baking...Always a Necessity!

I make it fully known that I have a hard time letting my kids "help me". I am learning. I love baking, which makes it that much harder to let my kids help me when I do. My perfectionism (yes, pick yourself up off the floor), is at its PEAK when I bake. Its my comfort, my love, and a way that both helps me think, and helps me escape. Its therapy! Good for my brain, bad for my waistline. 

I started planning SEPARATE baking projects for my kids. This day we decided to bake banana bread. We had a few rotting bananas ( Keeping it real, people...they were brown), and they needed a good home. My girls really did well, even Gloria sat and stayed with me through the entire process. I love baking b/c it applies so many learning tasks in one. Math, science, reading, and emphasizes things like task completion, following directions and taking turns. All things my kids really struggle with! It was fun all around. We then ate this banana bread during afternoon Tea Time ( post on this coming soon)!

May, the month of Our Mother

Thank you to Catholic Icing for this FABULOUS idea. While my family does not have a specific devotion to Mary, our Mother ( other than the expected from a good Catholic Family :)), I love May for this reason. An entire month to celebrate Our Blessed Mother. We went, last week, to a great Family Rosary and May Crowning, which we lovely, and a new experience for my kids. 

Since my kids love to be artisitc, I am always looking for ways to play it up. They dont seem to get bored of just paper and crayons ( THANK GOODNESS), I know I do. So when I found this exciting Miraculous Medal idea, I was sold. WHO KNEW YOU COULD COLOR ON ALUMINUM FOIL? It never occured to me. Bella had the best time. 

Template

I did do the tracing onto the foil for her!

Practicing her cutting!

 While Bella and I were doing this project, we had a bit of company keeping a close eye. Blaise had a blast sitting in the high chair, and watching us. As he gets closer to crawling, he does not enjoy not being able to see whats going on or being excluded. which means he doesnt like to be in the family room while we are in the kitchen ( note: these rooms are right next to each other, not separated by anything!!)

Finished Product!

These now hang in the window in the kitchen. I am hoping to have Max make on this weekend so that I can have his hanging up as well. My ONLY complaint, if you can even call it that, is that this has to be colored with permanent marker. As we know, Gloria seems to like those these days! HA!

Bugs ALIVE!

My kids just LOVE bugs. I mean, every fire ant send a squeal through their lips with delight. I am so glad they have a love for all this nature, but bugs are NOT my thing. Sorry kids. I can fake excitement for their sakes, but they really gross me out! At the park  near our home ( in the Blakeney shopping center), we spend alot of time in the grassy area. Bugs are EVERYWHERE! One this day, they found the most beautiful (thats alot coming from me) caterpillar. I do not know if the pictures do him justice, but he was the prettiest shade of blue/grey! The kids were just enamored with him. They didnt want to put him down. If they had had a microscope, he would have been under it for sure!  It made me heart melt! Some days, I wish I loved anything as much as my kids love bugs! 

Blaise's First Tattoo

I looked away for 30 seconds. Compliments of big sister, Gloria, and the permanent marker she found in those 30 seconds! Good thing he is so sweet!

Self-portrait Day!

The girls pretty much just giggle with delight at having their picture taken. Unless of course we have paid a professional to take their picture, when all of a sudden they becomes shy, and uncooperative! How sweet are my girls?

My FAVORITE!!! HAHA!

Seriously...I love this face!

NEVER TURN YOUR BACK...

on Gloria for even a second! Poor Gus got his first tattoo, compliments of his big sister! Yep, she even did it in permanent ink! Lord, give me patience :) Gloria seems to be turning into such a force to be reckoned with these days. As her 2nd birthday is quickly approaching, she is getting faster, busier and more mischievousby the minute. Often it is literally like a tornado has run through the room. I chase after her trying to get her to stop, and before I can get the last thing she threw/dropped/ate/colored on/sat on/flushed down the toilet, she is onto the next thing. My sister originally got us a playpen for Blaise to nap in to keep him SAFE from Gloria, but most days I am putting Gloria in it so I can know where she is and what she is doing. I do think God made 2 year olds cute for a reason...He knows!

The forgotten child.

Max is 6.5 years old. I know I post about him some, but with him being in school all day, I hardly get the chance to take pictures of him doing anything. He, most times, is my most difficult child. Other times, he is the easiest. Of all the children in the house, he is the best helper, often stopping a tantrum in order to do a task, which tells me he is also in full control of his tantrum...alas, that's another post! ( I have learned that I can even calm him down with the distraction of a chore. He loves it that much...It is also his love language) Here he is in his Tae Kwon Do uniform. Its been really good for him, and he does enjoy it! Thank you to my sister for giving him this opportunity!I just wish he would smile...better!

The Narrow Road

These words from St. John of the Cross resonate deep within my soul. SO much so, that I have now pasted them on the inside cover of my journal ( or at least have typed it, printed it, cut it, but could not find a glue stick). The words in capital letters are  " USE THE CROSS". I have been thinking about this lately. How do I use the cross? How do you interpret these words in your own life?  I have been seeking guidance from the Lord on several matters regarding the future of my family. Where is the Lord asking us to go? Am I allowing my emotions or feelings about what I want to influence my decisions?
I posted a while back about God helping me to detach from our material possessions  I saw this quote from St. John a while ago, but its only now hit home. I believe what St. John is alluding to is not just material possessions though. I believe he is pointing to ANYTHING that takes us away from the holy will of God. ( thanks dear friend for that amazing thought last week). Said friend also brought something to my mind that had not really occurred to me on this level! We can form attachments to things even if they are good things. By seeking out only God's will in my life, I am realizing my serious attachment to things. Even worse is my attachment to people and events in the hopes of seeing these good people. Again, even these things, which are seemingly good, can be attachments. I WAS BLOWN away by my friends words. I had known that I could be a bit of a stalker to people I really admire, and seek counsel from. (shh!..it could be you) I find myself reading all the things they post on Facebook, or emails they write, or even to the point of being upset/put out that I WASN'T invited to some event ( crazy? yes...but true) My only attachment should be to the HOLY WILL OF GOD. St. John's words continue to reach me..."the road is narrow". HOW TRUE IS THAT?!?! I believe the road is narrow for all those seeking His will in their lives. Not many do that. I am eternally grateful for the Catholic faith, and its tremendous gift of Adoration. This time alone spent with the Lord every week is single-handily the most important time of my week. It has made an immense difference in my ability to "use the cross", and "suffer willingly for the Lord". It does make my road more "easily traveled", as I can rest in the confidence of my Lord's guidance. I notice, usually within a few days, when I am not taking time out of my day for prayer. When I miss Adoration, I FEEL it...the "walking alone" is tangible. I believe this is God's way of calling me back to Him. At my First Saturday meeting ( monthly meeting for all family with sons/daughters/spouses in Cenacolo), we were reflecting on whether we were working on changing the behaviors that contributed to our family entering "Community" by taking it to prayer and Adoration or by decision and will. I was struck by this as well. I often find that I rely to heavily on my on HUMAN self to make the changes needed. Even with Adoration, I forget that I can not do it alone. My road is "more easily" traveled when I rely simply on the Lord. My decision and will I think are part of it, but it can only come to fruition and fulfillment through the grace of the Holy Spirit! I am keenly aware, also, that the only way my family can heal is by walking the narrow road. We are walking in a place most will not, can not, or do not know to go. I might be naive to think that most people really will do everything they can, given there state in life and tools they are equipped with, to save their marriage and families. OK, I might be very naive, but I do think most people are not equipped with the beauty of trust in the Lord. Even though the road is narrow, Jesus walked it also. He made the path that is now called the narrow road. Without Him, my family would be lost.

What are your thoughts? Any experiences you want to share? Does this quote from St. John of the Cross move you in any way? I'd love to hear!

Family Rosary

Bella got a bit chilly eating ice cream

 This past Friday, we attended a Family Rosary event at a parish near our home. It was a beautiful evening, starting with Vespers and Benediction. We then followed with a Rosary said in Latin, Spanish and English, while walking all around the church building and school. It was a great witness with I think, at least, 150 people participating.  Afterward, there was an ice cream social, which made all the effort worth it for the kids. The children all ran around in the grass, and had a grand time. It truly brought joy to my heart watching my children play, after such beautiful prayers. I felt so appreciative of the community in which we live. We have access to so many opportunities to experience our Faith. It was a great night!

She is such a stinker

Never heard a peep out of him!

The Beautiful Mary Statue that 4 men carried during out procession

One of the First Communicants placed the crown on Mary!

again, as good as it gets!

3 under 3

Isabella 3 and 1/2

Gloria 1 and 3/4

Blaise 5 months

 A Picture is worth a thousand words!